


27

by smolder



Category: The Chronicles of Chrestomanci - Diana Wynne Jones
Genre: F/M, Gen, Millie POV, POV Female Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-13
Updated: 2016-12-13
Packaged: 2018-09-08 09:02:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,418
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8838568
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smolder/pseuds/smolder
Summary: Usually a Chrestomanci was born with nine lives. Sometimes they lost a few either in everyday life, between worlds, or protecting the realms from nefarious magical use. But those nine tend to always come in handy because Chrestomanci were always powerful (how could they not be with so many lives?) and so they held a lot of responsibility - were often in danger.
Christopher had 27.
The first time he told Millie this, Christopher, himself, hadn’t seemed to understand exactly what that meant. But she had. It helped perhaps, that she had been contemplating for so long, and with such focus, what happened at the end of her time as the Living Asheth. But she knew instantly that more lives for Christopher would only mean more deaths in the end. (Living Asheths became dead young women, as the portent showed.)
It was the balance of such things.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ivy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ivy/gifts).



> Disclaimer: I own nothing. The book, within the Chrestomanci series, I am solely working from, is "The Lives of Christopher Chant", which is by the wonderful author Diana Wynne Jones.  
> A/N 1: I am using a slight AU, wherein Christopher has twenty-seven lives. This does not change a great deal plot-wise in the book, but it does make things a bit darker. Because, as you can see by the summary, more lives mean more deaths. This does allow me to bring out bits of Millie's personality though, that I thoroughly enjoyed in the book.  
> A/N 2: Reviews are Good. This has been a subtle hint from the author - Please return to your regularly scheduled reading.

Millie only spent three months away at boarding school.

 

It was a fantasy, something she had thought and dreamed about endlessly those long days inside the walls of the Temple Asheth after reading that wonderful book series from whence she took her name. But, ultimately, it was simply _play_ for her and she quickly became bored of it. The most they can teach her here is assimilation to the lives of girls her age. And she is not entirely sure she wants that anymore - in her _old_ world, a female of her age would be considered a young woman, _not_ a child. There is a reason she had outgrown her position as avatar after all. It feels infantilizing to be pushed into such a younger role.

 

And it is hard to make friends when she does not know how, when she does not remember a time she has had to _try_. With Christopher, he appeared and, over repeated visits and their similar fates and skills, it just sort of happened. Here they all are so very different and she feels very alone.

 

( _That is not different._ )

 

When it comes to actual education, there is little for her to learn. She had lessons with the Sisters of the Temple Asheth daily and her original world seems to have been beyond this one’s in some subjects - or else they simply do not teach such things in this school. She finishes her work quickly in classes and takes the extra time to write down the knowledge ( _just in case_ ) so it won’t get lost.

 

At night she reads the letters, he faithfully sends her, and strokes Proudfoot ( _the kitten growing steadily into a proud Temple cat_ ) for comfort.

 

When she finally packs her bags it feels good. When the driver pulls up to the castle, it feels right. When the door burst open, before she even reaches it, and he is there _(tripping over a loudly complaining Throgmorton in his hurry_ ) smiling widely, tiredly, just a bit brokenly, something in her settles.

 

She had always known where she was needed - _who_ needed her.

 

Christopher.

 

******

 

Usually a Chrestomanci was born with nine lives. Sometimes they lost a few either in everyday life, between worlds, or protecting the realms from nefarious magical use. But those nine tend to always come in handy because Chrestomanci were always _powerful_ (how could they not be with so many lives?) and so they held a lot of responsibility - were often in danger.

 

Christopher had 27.

 

The first time he told Millie this, Christopher, himself, hadn’t seemed to understand exactly what that meant. But she had. It helped perhaps, that she had been contemplating for so long, and with such focus, what happened at the end of her time as the Living Asheth. But she knew instantly that _more lives_ for Christopher would only mean _more deaths_ in the end. ( _Living Asheths became dead young women as the portent clearly showed_.)

 

It was the balance of such things.

 

( _And it made her so angry to learn later that deWitt had taken all but two of his lives after finding out he could spirit travel. She both despises the highhandedness of him taking such things that don’t belong to him, the control he took over Christopher without even asking his opinion at all - as well as the blame she holds. That keeping him stuck in the Temple wall, kept him from getting back before he would get caught. She does not apologize for such things - she needed to figure out her fate, she only has this one life of her own. And Millie is well aware it is in her ability for treachery, if it is necessary, that she is truly different from Christopher._ )

 

Their lives hadn't been exactly the same, neither had ever claimed that, but they held similarities: people only wanted them for their use, not who they were. She had seen that from the first time he had told her even a bit about himself. And Christopher had a bad habit of being too honest to anyone who gave him even a little attention, could be gullible if he wasn’t careful, let people guilt or twist him into things. She would have to be extra eyes for him (extra arms, extra magic, extra luck if need be - she had plenty.)  

 

***

 

It was the night after the faced the Dright, that Millie and Christopher shared a bed as children much younger than themselves would. _Well_ , she had thought viciously at the time, _they have just asked us to be adults - to lead the adults when they did not know what they were doing. To use us, even though they very obviously do not like us, because they need what we can do for them. It should be perfectly acceptable for us to be allowed at least pretend to be children for a little while_.

 

It is matter of shared protection, really, she had considered practically ( _with Throgmorton at the foot of their bed glaring at the darkness as if it has wronged him_ ) - and a way to constantly make sure that the other is both alive and safe.

 

But upon waking up with Christopher beside her, she does not feel lonely ( _as she has for so many years_ ) because there is solid warm proof, that she is _not alone_ right beside her. And that is one of the strongest revelations she has ever had. It is something she knew _passively_ _,_ she is sure, but the knowledge hits her heart like lightning in that moment: that _with Christopher_ , she will _never_ be alone.

 

Millie does not wish to give that up. ( _Hates that she must then return to her own room before anyone notices it has been unoccupied all night._ )

 

The first night she is home from school ( _and isn't it odd that this castle she has stayed in only a handful of days in her life, would feel like home to her simply because Christopher is here too?_ ), she sneaks back into his bed as well. He does not turn her away - and almost seems relieved to see her, she thinks. When the maids find them in the morning people try to make a fuss but neither of them will let others rule them in such ways.

 

_(Not anymore, anyway. They are a bit jaded to such things, have known Priestesses and Uncles that would form their lives like clay into creations meant to smash in the end, when their worth was used up._ )

 

Christopher’s anger is like a sleeping dragon, slow to rouse ( _able to seethe inside for months_ ) but terrible once truly awoken _._ She is much quicker to take offense, much quicker to defend ( _much quicker to deceive_ ). And she has a stare about her when angered - she is well aware - strong, haughty, direct, and older than her years. But she was ( _still is, will ever be_ ) the Living Asheth, vessel of a Goddess with four arms and the sort of potential for cruelty only deity knows.

 

But she also knows, deep down, without a doubt, that one day Christopher Chant will be her Consort and she will be his wife. She has little patience for those who try to treat them with so little respect because of their age, while still expecting so much from them. They are either children or adults - people cannot have it both ways.

 

It takes some time, but eventually the matter is dropped. They all still talk, as if sleeping beside someone is the most scandalous thing in the world - but then, they always did talk anyway.

 

Some nights now Christopher and her will whisper to each other under the warm comfort of the blankets before they go to sleep. He tells her about his early life, his parents and governesses, his adventures in various other Anywheres ( _the gifts he was given, like a clockwork dragon, a flute, and some mermaids who gave him a pearl skull necklace - he shakes a bit whenever he mentions the mermaids and she hugs him tightly_ ). About the way Tacroy (who he will always think of by his spirit name) would coach him in cricket in between their work (Tacroy, the only adult who had never treated him as just a _useful thing_ ) and how Dr. Porson taught him more about magic than any other person ever has. Because although there were all the little spells to fix what he broke when his magic initially seemed to explode, making everything lift during a simple levitation spell, when silver was removed, it was the overall lesson that stuck most with him. That he must repair his own messes ( _that large magic might be flashy but it will often result in lots of broken things both large and small._ )

 

She tells him what she remembers of life before the Temple: of a family that it hurts to remember because they let her go willingly, happily, without thought of her future well-being ( _he awkwardly comforts her when she becomes upset at this, not pity but empathy in the way he speaks_ ). She tries to explain the religion that chose her as Goddess, talks about portents and signs they must learn to read, and the various Priestesses (the hierarchy therein). The importance of the Asheth Temple cats, the reverence her people held them in, the way they could furiously protect a place and the magic they could do when they wished. About the one day a year when she was paraded around outside, the only day a year she _saw_ the outside - the way they would all crowd in ( _so close, so loud, so many_ ) and try to touch her for luck ( _the bruises upon her body afterwards from their fervency_ ). Not even seeing her as a person.

 

They don’t mention the loneliness but it is almost physically present in every single story they tell. They don’t need to.

 

She prefers those nights, not just for the closeness they bring, but because it means he is not _away_ . When he is away she cannot be with him ( _he is not with her)_. But she can guard his body, his physical self. And she does. She has learned to accept that she was chosen by the Goddess Asheth for a reason. She is strong in her own power, and although she learned much in the Temple, there is much she can still learn on her own.

 

And she would use _all of it_ to protect him from any that would seek to do him harm.

 

Looking down on him, when she knows part of him is gone, fills her with such contradictory feelings. So warm and sharp. Millie knows, she could _never_ ask him not to go - it is a part of him, to cage him would be to kill him slowly. And it was through these travels that he met her. Even with all the danger, all the death, she cannot hate such a thing completely that brought him into her life.  

 

***

 

They continue to age and grow - and he continues to die in various ways as he is sent out on missions. Because after the Dright, they don’t seem to see a reason to wait much longer in his Chrestomanci training. After all, he has _so many_ lives.

 

Suffocation, drowning, trampling by wild animals, poison, breaking his spine, puncturing his lung, electrocution - she witnesses nearly all of them. The day after he will always smile and joke about it. It seems morbid at first ( _it seems hurtful truly, to treat things that are so traumatic to experience - even second hand, so lightly_ ) but Millie quickly learns to play along. Because, others might not understand, but this is how he fights the darkness of his situation, how he keeps from falling into madness. How he keeps from becoming like Gabriel deWitt, who still holds the title of Chrestomanci, so very dour and lacking in empathy.

 

When Christopher is sixteen she tells him the name she was called before the Temple took her. She would hate for anyone else to know - for the most part the Castle’s inhabitants have forgotten her past and she prefers it that way. She is just Millie to them and that is simple, neat; it is like having a secret you never intend to tell, just the forgetfulness of time working it’s own form of magic. But where everyone else takes this simpler story as their truth, _they_ will always remember, and she likes that thought even better.

 

He catches on nearly instantly to the importance of what she has gifted him. He calls her Millie in public and only ever speaks her original name in private. Millie is very pleased by how observant he is of even her subtle moods - but Christopher _always_ tries so hard with her, even when others view him as cold. He seems desperate that he never do anything to make her leave, to lose her friendship.

 

( _They are both fiercely possessive of their friendship - of whatever their friendship will become._ )

 

She does not take his doubt personally though, because she knows it is because most others have been transient in his life: nursery maids, governess, servants, footmen - no one stayed more than six month in his home growing up ( _and usually it was for much less time_ ). And his parents relationship had devolved into only speaking through other people, before Christopher was even born.

 

Millie tries to reassure him - she has no intention of ever leaving ( _Christopher is hers in a way she thinks no one or nothing else has ever been_ ). But she can tell that only time will truly press that upon him.

 

***

 

When they finally marry - and become Christopher and Millie Chant, it feels expected by everyone. A good match they say: her money and his power ( _they have forgotten that she is an enchantress as well, it makes her smile secretly_ ). And really it is a _thoroughly_ normal affair. It is only later, in the privacy of their room, that they recite the old rite she had previously written down from memory.

 

That is when she seals Christopher Chant to the part of her that is still ( _will always be_ ) the Living Goddess as her Consort.

  
_They glow a pale gold when the Goddess Asheth places her blessing on the union - but only, the former Temple cats (now protectors of Chrestomanci Castle), Throgmorten and Proudfoot notice - the couple were to wrapped up in each other to care. Really, it is a fitting audience._


End file.
